Paul was delivered. Paul’s sins were forgiven. Paul’s guilt is purged. Paul had even been caught up into the third heavens. He heard unspeakable words not lawful for men to utter. And yet he says:
O, wretched man, that I am.This is a cry that is born in the school of Jesus. And when we feel his holiness. You see the more holy we are, the more unholy we will feel ourselves to be. That is true, my dear friends, of every single Christian grace not just holiness. Every single Christian grace. The more you have of it, the more you realize how little you have of it.Think of it this way. It is like going into a living room full of furniture before the sun comes up and dusting the furniture. And thinking you have got it all. And then the sun comes up and you look at the furniture and you realize, well, it is dirtier there than it was ever before. But it is not. There is less dust, but you see more of it, because you are closer to the light. The closer we are to the Son of righteousness in the experience of our soul, the more we will see the filth of our heart, because he is absolute purity. He is holy, harmless, undefiled, separate from sinners. Have you ever noticed that in the people of God: that they complain the most against themselves, about the very things that they seem so strong in?1
Joel Beeke
24 Wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death?