Song of Solomon 2:15 (ESV)

15 Catch the foxes for us, the little foxes that spoil the vineyards, for our vineyards are in blossom.”

Here we read that they are together again. We hear them talking together about the little foxes that have to be caught. These little foxes are a threat to the vines that are starting to bud. The little foxes (or jackals) were a nuisance when they invaded vineyards. The vintners tried everything to keep these animals out of their vineyards, because they destroyed the vines with their digging. It was probably also part of the woman’s job to keep the family’s vineyard free from foxes or jackals. She had to guard that vineyard (see Song of Solomon 1:6).

Here the words about the little foxes in the vineyard are used as imagery. The husband and wife together are saying here that anything that might disturb their love affair needs to be caught. It seems that the main focus here is on anything in the environment that can harm their relationship; anything that can somehow come between them. The next verse also points in this direction, when the wife emphatically says of her husband that he belongs to her and she belongs to him, My beloved is mine and I am his!

Let us now mention some of those little foxes that can threaten married life even today.

It can happen that even after their children are married, parents exert such an influence on their children that it easily creates problems in their children’s marriages. After the marriage of their children, parents may react in such a way that it seems that the married ones still have to do exactly what the father and mother say. They are expected to set up their program completely according to their parents’ plans. Then it may happen, when married children make choices that are needed for their own freedom and family, that problems with their parents arise. The relationship gets disturbed. This in turn can cause problems or tension between husband and wife in marriage. Parents should not put such a strain on their children after they are married. They too must remember that God’s command for the married couple from the beginning is, Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh (Genesis 2:24). Before God husband and wife have then become an independent unit of life who, in loving obedience to the Lord, may and must also be on their own.

Friends can also be one of the little foxes. It is good to have friends. But it can also be the case that when you are married, there are always other people around you. There are always friends in your house or you are always visiting with friends. Then you do not really have time for each other. Everything has to be done and discussed with others present. Over time this will negatively affect the relationship in your marriage. It may happen that the husband and wife can no longer live without the other person or persons. You then seek contact with others because having each other is no longer enough. The true complete love relationship has not come to fruition, or it has become atrophied. You are not really one body with your husband or wife. This is a danger that threatens our marriage. We must work to remove such little foxes from our marriage in time to truly be one body in all things.

Such things can lead to the fact that your own husband or wife no longer satisfies you. That you start—almost imperceptibly—looking for someone else. Your feelings begin to develop in that direction when someone else begins to pay a lot of attention to you. That other person is someone who understands you and your feelings. The temptation can then be very great because you have neglected your own marriage.

In this regard Proverbs 5:1–4 is very important.

The danger being tempted by another man or woman is best combated by us when we work in our marriages to create an intimate bond of love for one another. When we also pray together for this. The love that needs to be there for each other over and over again in marriage is what the Holy Spirit points out in Proverbs 5:15–20.