In the previous verses the woman recalled a precious memory when she fell in love. Now she also tells us about the time before that—the time when she was not really thinking about marriage. 

She recalls a memory of what her brothers said about her at that time. She was still young then. Her breasts were not yet fully grown. That was the sign that she had yet to grow into adulthood. Yet at that time, the family had been thinking about how to react when this girl starts to mature, when boys will begin to seek contact with her. The brothers occupy a large place in the woman’s family in this Bible book. We do not read of a father, which leaves the impression that the father has died. In that case we are dealing with a single-parent family here—one where the brothers also carry a great responsibility.

What the brothers are saying is part of a good upbringing. In it they point to the way of God’s will. It is the guidance that a father and mother in a family ought to have given at this point. Parents should think about the future of their children. If you have been given a daughter by the Lord, it is the parents’ responsibility to think about how they can show her the right way through puberty, also in terms of sexuality. That also includes her contact with the opposite sex. The same applies, of course, when it comes to raising boys in the family.

It is not good that when it comes to matters of love and sexuality, there is silence in the family. It is not right when parents remain silent on this point because they are uncomfortable with the topic. This is a very important part of a Christian upbringing. It is important in parenting to answer the children’s questions; to give proper and loving guidance, also when it comes to sexuality, as we read in Deuteronomy 6: And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates (Deuteronomy 6:6–9). It is important for parents to provide the right guidance when their children are at the age where sexual feelings are starting to play a bigger role in their lives—when they start looking at the opposite sex.